Finding The Right Word by Leanne Dyck

I've always been able to express myself better through writing. Verbally, I grasp for words, use an incorrect word or mispronounce words. The problem worsens when I'm addressing a non-supportive audience.

For example...

I was a member of a group for a while. Two members of this group were really smart. They had the pieces of paper to prove it. (But I suspect, even with their degrees, they suffered from low self-esteem.) I made the mistake of telling them that I was hoping to become an author. I could see and hear them judging me. They openly made fun of the way I spoke. I'd hoped that this type of bullying would end when I become an adult, but sadly it didn't--at least not in that group. And, although they didn't come right out and say it to my face, I knew they thought I was diluting myself with my dreams of becoming an author.

If something similar is happening to you or someone you love IT NEEDS TO STOP!

Here's what helped me...

-Realize that the power is yours to give. If you are around people who don't support or respect or empower you, end the relationship. Or, if ending the relationship isn't possible, minimize your time around these people.

-Realize that you can play the victim or the hero in your life. If you want to be the hero, act like it; see yourself as one. Believe in your abilities. Believe in your dreams. Don't ask for validation from an outside source. Draw from the strength within you.

To be honest, I had strong doubts that I could fulfill my dream. If I hadn't, I would have been able to ignore the bullying. My biggest concern was that in order to be an author I had to sound like I was smart. My biggest fear was that I didn't sound that way. My biggest fear was that I wasn't smart enough.

But, with restored believe in myself, I sought out those who would support my dream. I found them in my community and I found them in books. 

I bought and listened to the audiobook version of Stephen King's On Writing. And he said, 

"Put your vocabulary on the top shelf of your toolbox, and don't make any conscious effort to improve it. (You'll be doing that as you read, of course...but that comes later.) One of the really bad things you can do to your writing is to dress up the vocabulary, looking for long words because you're maybe a little bit ashamed of your short ones. This is like dressing up a household pet in evening clothes. The pet is embarrassed and the person who committed this act of premeditated cuteness should be even more embarrassed. Make yourself a solemn promise right now that you'll never use 'emolument' when you mean 'tip'... Remember that the basic rule of vocabulary is use the first word that comes to your mind, if it is appropriate and colorful. If you hesitate and cogitate, you will come up with another word--of course you will, there's always another word--but it probably won't be as good as your first one, or as close to what you really mean."

That's what he said. And what I heard him say was that I was good enough. Me. I.  And so are you. Don't let anyone stand between you and your dream.

More...

Kristen Lamb wrote an interesting article on self motivation. Here's the link.

Next Monday: Book review:  When Everything Feels Like the Movies 

Sharing my author journey...

On Monday, August 24th, Louise Penny (mystery author) was The Vancouver Writers Fest featured author.

Book review: Tess of the d'Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy (part two)

Part two of a review written by me (while in middle school). And in case you missed it (or what to re-read it), here's the link to part one.

Alec versus Angel (continuation)

“Prosecution, please state your case.”

“Your Honour, we, of the Prosecution, are going to bring to light a bond and a special love between two persons: a love so strong that it withstands all. The love that is evident between Miss Tess Duberfield and Mr. Angel Clare. To illustrate this bond I shall call one member of this party to the stand. Prosecution calls Mr. Clare to the stand.”

“Will Mr. Clare take the stand?”

“State your full name.”

“Angel Clare.”

“Place your right hand on the Bible.”

“I swear by almighty God to tell the truth and nothing but the truth so help me God.”

“Do you remember the night that Miss Tess Durberfield told you of the abuse which she had suffered at the hands of Mr. d'Urberville.”

“Yes, I do.”

“Do you remember how she reacted when she heard your tale of the affair you had in London?”

“Yes, she excepted it with... Her love was unconditional.”

“I submit to your Honour that it was unconditional love in the relationship between Miss Durberfield and Mrs. Angel Clare that guaranteed that the woman, Miss Durberfield, would never be cold heartedly mistreated. A guarantee missing in the relationship Miss Tess Durberfield had with Mr. Alec d'Urberville.

How did you feel when she told you about the unfortunate affair she had with Mr. d'Urberville?”

“Well, I suppose I felt anger not so much at Tess as the man who tampered wth my perfect image of womanhood. I was so naive.

I suppose I even felt that I had been deceived by her. I felt that she had simply used her respectability. It was in the heat of the moment I was insane with suffering. Her honesty cut so deep.

If she had only somehow made me listen. I would have understood. I would have.”

“Do you remember what brought you back to her.”

“I suppose it was while I was away in Brazil I came to realize that my love for her was not based on labels but on the woman.”

“I submit to you, Your Honour, that at the hands of Alec d'Urberville Tess Durberfield suffered more than she could have ever suffered at the hands of Angel Clare. The witness is now yours.”

“Mr. Clare, the member of the Prosecution did touch on the flight you took away from Miss Tess Durberfield, but not to my satisfaction. I would like to ask you if you loved Tess as much as you profess you do what would motivate you to pick up and leave the woman you loved? Furthermore, what would cause you to stay away for one year during which time the woman you supposedly loved fell on such hard times that she unable to do little else but to return to the only man who seemed to care enough for her take her in—Mr. D'Urberville?”

“I suppose, sir, that I fled out of anger. Yet, the anger swiftly turned to sorrow as I realized fully what I had done to the woman I loved.

However, I stayed away one year to give her a chance to really come to terms with what she wanted to do.”

“One year for such a decision?”

“I too feel on hard times thus it was beyond my capabilities to return to her.”

“The Defense rests, your Honour.”

“The Prosecution rests, your Honour.”

“In light of the evidence that has been brought forward to me in this court of law the court has no other choose but to find in favour of Mr. Angel Clare.”

Next post:  What do you do when others don't believe in you?

Sharing my author journey...
How do you remain excited about writing?
One way I do is by reading good books and listening to authors I admire.

I've reviewed not one but two mysteries penned by Louise Penny: